Thursday, September 23, 2010

GUEST POST: Missing in Action

Well, as the theme suggests, I've gotten away from the rat race for a few days. In my stead, so rad (and I don't use the word "rad" lightly) bloggers have filled in. I'm cracking up reading this rambling rant of awesomeness from Andrew Lazorchak, the mind behind Vineyard Vlog and the nifty little decanting device: Wine Soirée. If Drew's stuff reads like he's been shot out of a cannon, then it's fair to say that his writing has been properly represented his personality.

So, I hope you enjoy these guest posts. Just don't enjoy them too much. I'm not ready to give up on this blogging scam just yet. Sláinte! -Joe

The kid on the bike throwing the newspapers is coming around the corner. What’s the big news??? Joe Herrig is “Missing In Action”.

I am here to de-bunk the B.S. alibi that Joe Herrig AKA Suburban Wino is in Wine Country. Supposedly he is visiting Wine Country and is trying to network and see just why all the Atlanta Wine Bloggers keep on ending up in Sonoma County. There are various rumors surrounding what it is that keeps attracting these guys to Sonoma, but the stats are grimm…Atlanta wine bloggers are slowly but surely showing signs of not coming back. Well, in case you are not aware of the Bohemian Grove, there is a good chance that Joe is there now and at some Autumnal Equinox Owl Ceremony. And in case you have not been paying attention, DirtySouthWine has even showed some videos of his canoe conquest into the forbidden grove, dubbed under the moniker The Natural Process Alliance, where he talks about Talons and Falcons. Wine Tonite, Ed Thralls, was done before he even showed up in wine country. Ed admits he did not crack into a bottle of wine when he arrived, instead there are pictures of him in redwoods amidst a campfire.

Now if you believe any of this, you are a sucker. The “Real Deal” is that Joe Herrig is also a stunt man. He has stunt doubled for many unknown actors, which helps explain his fetish for B-rate films, his understanding of fine wine, and his paranoia of having a doppelgänger . As sources have been telling us, he is actually on some tropical isle doing stunts for a re-make of Chuck Norris’ – Missing In Action 1996.

On behalf of BNN ™ I am guest blogging for Joe while he is jumping out of planes and diving through windows. While I do not have Joe’s phantasmal sense of humor, I am relying on my 1.25 prior visits to read to inform me what it is that all of Joe’s viewer(s) are looking for in their thirst for wine knowledge and bizarro humor.

But what I thought we could do while Joe is in “Wine Country” is to see how many actors or personalities that Joe has probably done stunts for. And I apologize in advance for blowing Joe’s cover, but in one quick Google search for images of Joe Herrig or his look a likes - it is clear he is trying to stay off the radar. Click here to see what comes up when you search Joe Herrig (it changes hourly):

So hopefully you made it back after checking an image search for Joe Herrig. What did we learn?

  1. The Suburban Wino avatar is more popular than the real Joe, not a shocker. :)

  2. His lost-twin sister Felice Herrig is an MMA Babe.

  3. There is some 15 year old dweeb that also has the last name Herrig that is probably smarter than Joe & Me times 10.

  4. Joe needs to find a new caricature artist

  5. Joe forgot to introduce me to My Wine Genie , Kiley Baker.

  6. Joe uses an alias when he walks the red carpet at the AVN Awards Ceremony!

So as we move into the wine portion of the blog. I need to stop and give Suburban Wino major credit as he always ties wine into these ridiculous and non-associated topics and does it sinuously. (now I recall why I wanted to do a video blog – writing aint easy)

So in my juvenile hunt for pictures of Joe Herrig, I found it much more entertaining to look for notable entertainers that resemble Joe, than to look for images of Joe.

Now when it comes to wine, and secret lifestyles, there are many wines that live under the radar and need to make a break from the B-rate films, and get onto the red carpet of Americans palates. Just the way we all hope Joe does in his new action re-make “Missing In Action”.

My Missing In Action Grape for you all is the Mencia Grape. The Mencia grape hales from the NorthWestern area in Spain and produces a great wine. I first tried this wine at Terroir in NYC, and it was remarkable. The lady I was dining with, also a wine geek, said I had to try it and compared it to Pinot Noir. I was sold, at Pinot Noir. Now I have a love for Pinot Noir, but I also kind of burned myself out on Pinot Noir, as I drank it non-stop in my early foray into wine, and then I found Grenache…I digress. But what I like about Grenache, Pinot Noir, and Mencia – is their ability to be gamey, funky, and yet fruity. I guess this could be most wines, but these three all have some common traits. They are thin skinned grapes, can show great fruity characteristics, and they can provide a delightful easy on-the-palate wine that can be further assessed for subtle complexities that make you want to drink more. (And please be aware that International Grenache Day is Friday 9/24/10 – so get your #Grenache out!)

Anyway – back to Mencia. Unfortunately, Mencia is about as easy to find as an Atlanta Wine Blogger that stays in Atlanta. I have only had 2 different bottles of Mencia, and that is because I have only ever found 2 Spanish brands in the USA that make Mencia. The most readily available Mencia I have seen is Petalos, from Bierzo, a D.O. known for Mencia. You can also note that for a while Mencia was thought to be a relative of Cab Franc, but has recently been DNA matched to Jean du Dão a Portuguese varietal.

I have tried Petalos on 3 separate occasions and have always found it enjoyable. I recommend it as a wine that will not blow you away, but rather is teasing and flirtatious. While it is lighter on the palate, it suggests deeper darker secrets, just so long as you serve it at ambient temperature and give it some room to breathe. I found darker fruits on the 07 and not as much earth and forest floor funk as I would have liked to. But I promise, Mencia has some dark magic powers that will make you wish more importers were bringing it in. You might also find it curious that this Missing In Action grape has no planted vines in the USA. Not as far I have seen or heard. Also if you find some Mencia wine, you can also chalk up another point on your wine century chart.

And the message I’d like to leave us all with is: stay thirsty and remember just how BIG the world of wine is.

And the question I’d like to leave you with:

What are your thoughts on Mencia? And what actor would Joe be the best stunt double for?

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